Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Listening to Your Breathing

It seems like I am full of words of wisdom when the "Poop" hits the fan- (substitution for a more colorful phrase). I am continuing to reflect on my choices and what I am doing in my life right now that is effecting an outcome of some sort. It is amazingly easy to say "Give in and let GOD do his work"...but the actual action is a hard thing to do. I have come to the section of my journey where I must really look to Allah for guidance and acceptance.

My instincts right now are telling me to go back home and get in the bed and try it again another day, but I have to stretch myself past that and move on, get up get out and do something. Nothing seems to come easy to me, and the things I plan always fail if I do not have the proper perspective and guidance. I have know for years that in order to make a wise decision you need to make isthakar (prayer asking for direction). I can honestly say, I have not done that in years. I have been writing my own script without the directors blessings and it is now starting set a series of events to come to clean up my mess.

It is amazing how much Allah loves us and how much he cleans our messes and forces us to do whatever it is that we need to do to grow and change. As I make more lemonaide out of my lemons I can really appreciate and hear part of the message. I think the message is to be still and breathe in the sites, use the gifts that Allah has given me and be still. Shut my mouth and listen to the sound of my breathing and the sounds around me. But here is the tip...How do you become still? I have thoughts racing and plans being planned in my mind as I sleep, day dream and even when I am really not trying to- You know what they say "You are not crazy if you talk to yourself, you are only crazy when you answer too..." So I am shutting my mouth...

It is amazing what the mind has to say when you actually I am listening to the sound of my breathing.